Music is a sensory experience, and individuals with autism will respond to different music in different ways. Although D and K have very different likes and dislikes in music, they enjoy playing the piano together.

I should clarify, they are not playing the piano the way you might expect, more like playing with the piano. Ours is an electric one, with different keyboard sounds (“grand piano” and “harpsichord”) and some other electronic features. They like turning on the metronome as fast as it can go, experimenting with one or two notes over and over, and making high and low sounds to express mood. They even try to sound out Nintendo game themes.

So it’s not Beethoven…. it works!

Years ago, someone in my church congregation regularly informed me that my child could not participate in the Primary (church class for little ones) until she was poddy trained.  I gave her a soft “oh really?” answer, because I knew the real policy – January after the child turned three they would join Primary with kids their age.

But I also knew that Christ Himself would never reject a child, especially not based on something like poddy training. This was a few years before I understood my daughter had autism, but I was noticing some developmental delays. I knew she belonged at church, despite her differences.

By the way, she didn’t poddy train until age four and a half.

I’ve already mentioned the birds and the snails and the fun we had trying to have a phylum pet house. I understood that my HFA children struggled to go out into the wide world, so I brought the world to them a little bit at a time.

Another creature that joined our home was a hermit crab.

Individuals with autism tend to use their senses in unusual ways, so tasting the hermit crab was a concern. Although you can imagine the crab pinching if someone tried to eat them, they often retreat inside their shell when threatened. Therefore, we did not get the crab until I knew the children would respond and obey to the basic idea of “no touching unless mom helps.”

We would interact with the crab a little bit each day. Crabs are pretty simple – hide in the shell, reach out of the shell. K was initially freaked out when the animal would turn from a rock-like thing to a moving creature, but it provided excellent lessons in cause and effect. If she wanted to see all of the moving appendages, she had to be gentle and patient. It took months of exposure but she did learn and came to really enjoy he little guy.

Most individuals with autism have strong food preferences and aversions.  It comes from sensory issues and the dislike of variety and change. Trying to get basic nutrition into my children, I developed these simple food groups:

P – Protein

V – Vitamins

C – Carbohydrates

E – Extras

Each time we eat, we look if they have the first three categories (ironically, “PVC”) If D is eating noodles, I ask where is his protein food? (He usually chooses milk.) Where is his vitamin food? (He will go get an apple.) Soy sauce on his noodles (yes really) is the “extra.” K will get some cheese (P) and lettuce (V) with ranch (E).

It is not a perfect system and a nutritionist would probably have nightmares about it. I just had to start somewhere, and this worked.

Meditation is not only for the yoga-hippie. I’ve found it very helpful in my personal life, and use it to help my autistic kids. Meditation can take a lifetime to master and I don’t consider myself an expert. Still, a little knowledge can go a long way.

At it’s simplest, meditation is clearing your mind of thoughts. Usually you focus on a single thing – an image, a sound, or your own breathing.  You continue for a length of time, providing yourself a chance to rest and rejuvenate. D loves this process. He says it is like a “reboot” of his brain, so he doesn’t “crash.”  He gets in comfortable position, closes his eyes, and focuses on his breathing or a certain sound. (Once he asked if it was OK to focus on the sound of the dishwasher. Sure! Whatever works!) While occasionally he will use meditation to calm down when he is overwhelmed, it works best to meditate as part of a daily routine.

Try it! And post experiences you have!

K is terrified of Santa.

Autism affects the development of imagination. If you think about Santa in a literal sense, he is pretty creepy: He is this big, strangely dressed man with face mostly hidden by copious hair and beard, and glasses that hide his eyes; you are expected to sit on his lap and tell your secrets; he knows what you are doing all the time, and evaluates your behavior; he can come into your house, even if you have no chimney, but ONLY when you are asleep…

Creepy indeed.

About age nine she understood that Santa was always someone dressed up, and if she knew who it was under that costume, she did better. But we just don’t do Santa at our house.

I write a lot about sensory sensitivity, because it has a big impact on individuals with autism. I have also previously posted about picky eating.

So I am here to tell you that seedless watermelon are NOT. Maybe they don’t have hard, black bits, but they do have those flakes of white that feel like you’re chewing on a piece of skin.

Maybe you can tolerate them and eat without spitting, but not my kids. The white thingies are worse because they can’t poke them out before eating the fruit.  Mostly, they don’t eat watermelon, or anything else with seeds.

If you know autism, you know how it can affect clothing choices.

Tada!

Despite Hanes being sold within other stores, this really is the cheapest place to get it. (If someone knows differently, please reply!)

We regularly buy the same underwear, undershirts, sweats, and socks. (We get a lot of hand me downs or I am sure we would be going for the shirt selection as well.)

It really helps to have the same cut and fabric, and as the children grow, it still feels the same to them. And they are so easy to replace.

Good luck!

Besides great quality oils and excellent descriptions, this is the best aromatherapy purchasing site for one reason – sample bottles.  Before you spend a lot of money on an oil you can’t stand or your child doesn’t like, you can try it for 2-3 dollars. (A few are more expensive, up to 5 dollars.) It’s just a little vial of oil, but perfect for trying.

I have written about smells and autism before and this is a good way to try. Besides lavender that my daughter loves (we buy a bigger bottle of that) my son likes neroli and rose geranium, and I am completely in love with amber. (I’m still using the sample vials, a little goes a long way with these oils.)

Have fun!

Individuals with autism tend to be very picky about their clothing, and willing to wear only a few types. This stems from being sensory sensitive.

We LOVE hand-me-downs and shopping at second hand stores. For starters, there is less financial commitment and less loss if the child decides they don’t like what you bought after all. Similarly, hand me downs can be tried on gradually over several days, and if they don’t fit, there is no loss. Taking my children to a clothing department is difficult enough, (K would hide under the racks and not answer when called!) trying things on there is nearly impossible.

Eventually we learned that both kids preferred slightly worn clothing, it tended to be stretched out and softer.

We did get clothes from other sources too, and I shall write about them another time!